I think I’m going to start a new series entitled, “I heard it at the Waffle House” because I hear the best stuff when I’m there. Like this morning for instance.
As I’m sure all you good patriotic Americans know, auditions for the new American Idol are underway. Here close to Birmingham they are especially underway because, again as I’m sure all of you know, Birmingham is home to two past winners and two runners-up. Bam! That’s right, it’s even coined the nickname “Magic City” according to all the papers. This is the place where dreams come true it seems.
Well anyways I go to sit down in my usual booth at Waffle House and end up sitting behind a mom and daughter duo and started doing what I do when I’m at Waffle House- listening in to what’s around me and then scribbling down as much of what they’re saying as I can because really, you can’t script reality better than reality can. Call me an eavesdropper if you will, I’m merely an observer, looking for new characters.
Well as it turns out “Laura,” a big boned southern gal and her momma, a bigger boned southern gal had just come back from auditions and, believe it or not, “Laura” had gotten called back for round two. The irony is that all I had to write on was the newspaper, and the front page of the newspaper of course was about “Magic City” tryouts.
Mama: God did it. You’ve got to thank God everyday, girl. God gave you that voice; I didn’t get a voice like that. Your whole life’s gonna change now girl! Change for the better, nothin’ but singin’ from here on out.
Laura: I was about to burst into tears when I walked away and then he was like “we’d like you to come back!” Oh my God! This is crazy! I can’t believe this ya’ll! I told ‘em this was my dream! Ya’ll are my favorite people!
Mama (to the waitress): I was just prayin’ and part of me knew. Part of me knew. See we lost my mama last year, and she had a baby she lost, and I was just prayin’ Oh Jesus please! My babies going to Hollywood! You’re going to Hollywood, baby!
Laura: This is so crazy! I need a cigarette.
Mama: Uh-uh girl! No more smokin’, no more drinkin’, nothin’ but singin’ now Two hours a day at least. Now you gotta stay away from trashy people girl. Everything you do is gonna be scrutinized. If they ask you about drugs you say “No way!” If they ask you about children, you say uh-uh.
This is where I wondered if this really was the American dream in its modern incarnation. I don’t want to be negative or anything, and maybe she has an angelic voice and that’s what they’re really looking for when they think about ratings and all that, but it was shocking how much these people had riding on being the next American Idol. I mean it was the equivalent of worshipping God to them. I wonder how much they prayed before she got a call back? I smiled, but I was disturbed a little bit too. It just made me really appreciate my blessings, and my level headedness, and that I don’t have all my eggs in one basket.
The cell phone kept ringing and they were going in and out talking to people on the phone, the whole Waffle House knew. When they left everyone wished her good luck and she says, “I’ll come back and remember ya’ll.”
“What song did she sing?” one of the truckers eating in the house asked after she left.
“Crazy, by Pasty Cline,” the waitress says.
“Written by Willie Nelson,” another trucker chimed in.
I think that second trucker was my favorite person in the WH today. He knows his music. Willie Nelson did write Crazy, and he doesn’t get enough credit for it.
No comments:
Post a Comment