I had the joy of attending Sunday school with Grandma this morning, and this time I really mean Grandma’s Sunday school class. They said it was the first time they’d had a male visitor in as long as they could remember but they assured me I was welcome back any time.
It was rewarding to see the way these women, committed to a single religion for years and years and years, still get together and thrive on finding fresh ways to be good, outgoing Christians. It’s difficult for me to participate so to speak because of all the context I place the bible in because these women are sweet and simple and they take it at its word. Old and New Testament alike, it’s all God’s word. They don’t worry about inconsistencies, or that the nature of God in the Old Testament is utterly different than the new, and so when today’s topic is obedience to God its hard for me to really communicate what I believe without contextualizing it with a lot of historical and critical background on the bible. And yet, I thoroughly enjoyed it, and being with Grandma truly does make it a spiritual experience for me, its just different than other’s experience is all.
After church I bumped into Emily Rayburn, our neighbor here at Nell’s house, and spoke with her for a minute about being in Grandma’s class. Iva Bell, the lady who taught Grandma’s class, is well known around these parts for being very well read when it comes to scripture and the giving of herself. Mrs. Rayburn told me how she had meant and taught so much to Rick Mcdow back in the day. Rick Mcdow I know as one of Dad’s best friends growing up here in Columbiana. Grandma has told me how when the twins came to town they put Conrad with Lloyd and Rick with Dad and that was just sort of how it was. I also know about Rick because he was a POW in Vietnam for three years and then eventually released. Mrs. Rayburn told me how when Rick got back and told his story of survival it was the verses and teachings of the bible he remembered Iva Bell teaching him that got him through those long hard three years. Rick even shared what he knew with his fellow prisoners and it got them through.
Stories like this make me pause to notice where I learn the things that get me through hard times. Here I am in the same church, with the same Sunday school teacher my father and his friends probably had, thinking about the nature of the same God that’s been present all along. Actually attending Grandma’s class I got to meet the core lady elder’s of the church and wouldn’t you know it almost all them kept telling me how they had either a son or a daughter in either mom or dad’s class in school here.
As I was talking to Mrs. Rayburn another lady from the choir came up and asked me, “Do you sing?”
“Well, um, I sing to myself when I’m sad, does that count?”
She followed quickly with, “how bout you join the choir?”
“Well see if I knew where I was going to be I might think that’s a good idea but I’m sort of living day to ay and week to week right now. I don’t think I could give you the commitment you require…” I rambled off trying to parry the offer.
“Well soon as you get settled we’d love to have ya.”
“You got it.”
Grandma and I went out to lunch at the Golden Rule after and had BBQ and fried pickles and good conversation. On the way home, coming over the mountain, almost back to the farm, a black Mustang literally came over the hill, oncoming, and drifted right into our lane just as we were cresting the hill and didn’t seem to even notice it was headed straight into us. Before I could really even register what was happening I jerked the wheel to the right and swerved off the road to barely miss a head on collision and then swerved back onto the road right away to avoid running into the ditch that runs alongside the road, all with Grandma right in the front seat. Thank God we were ok, it could have been a lot worse. I had this flashback to when my car skidded out on the ice in Utah and the same thing happened except I couldn’t turn or do anything that time. I just watched it happen as we ran headfirst into Lea Thompson on a mountain pass. This time I watched it happened and then I watched myself pull some unconscious Nascar moves without really thinking about what I was doing. My self has cycled through all sorts of emotional responses towards the phantom other car I’ll probably never see again, or maybe I will, but what’s it matter? I was angry and wanted to turn around and track the car down just to yell at him/her and tell them what an idiot they were and what the hell was he thinking not paying attention on a two lane mountain road and driving straight into the oncoming lane and not even trying to correct himself. That was my child self and I recognized that pretty quickly and let it go. I was mostly just grateful Grandma and I were ok and thought about how that was way too close of a call. I thought about how happy I was I’d gone to church this morning and then I wondered if that was a silly thing to think. My heart was pounding and I was elated we that we hadn’t crashed and yet at the same time knew it was a miracle we didn’t. I thought back over my perfect swerve and realized I had done it almost unconsciously. The thought I remember going through my head was to honk at the other car as I saw it heading straight for us. Thank god I didn’t waste my time doing that. I just swerved. Someone grabbed the wheel just at the right moment, automatically almost, and swerved giving Grandma and I both a big jolt. Grandma kept saying that’s why she decided it wasn’t best for her to drive anymore. In a way it sort of validated her decision to stop driving to herself I could tell, and I suppose that might be a positive result of this almost accident as far as her peace of mind goes.
“That’s exactly why I figured before something like that happens I might as well just stop driving. No need runnin’ that risk,” she said.
At dinner last night two of my new friends asked me to list three things that annoy me and I couldn’t come up with a single one. “I don’t like to give other people the power to ruin my inner tranquility,” I told them. “If I’m annoyed by something I’m projecting some part of myself I need to work on more than likely. I guess if there’s one thing I don’t like its people who are fake and disingenuous. People who are trying to be something they’re not annoy me I guess.” Now here I am with a loaded emotional palate directed at this anonymous black mustang that almost just crashed straight into grandma and I and I don’t know what to do with it. I decided to simply count my blessings, pray for that driver, and move on with life as if nothing happened. Close calls are so powerful and yet, they don’t actually destroy anything. What close calls do is zap you into perspective that things like this could happen anytime anywhere no matter how much you try to prepare. The best defense you have is constant alertness, what a great super power that would be right?
I spent some time over at Nell’s this afternoon and when I came back Grandma was sitting in the chair looking out the picture window and I could tell it was on her mind but she didn’t mention it. We talked about other stuff for a bit and then she said,
“Now Cole you’re not still thinking about what happened in the car earlier are you? I’d hate to think you were upset about that. I mean I can sit here and think about what could have happened forever and its not gonna change anything so I figure its probably better just to count our blessings and move on.”
“I think you’re totally right Grandma. I thought about it from every angle and then I decided the only thing to get from it is to be thankful for our protection from the other side and realize that we’re blessed.”
“You know sometimes He does that. He just takes control when He needs to and keeps us safe. That’s happened more than once to us in all these years I think,” she said and did her humble shrug.
“You don’t have to think so when these things happened. It really just happened. It’s not a belief when it becomes a reality,” I sort of thought out loud and got a great big grin on my face while Grandma just kept nodding and shrugging.
So guys, I’m not supposed to have told you about this because we decided the best thing to do was not to talk about anymore so we didn’t dwell and worry on what could have happened. That means you can’t ask grandma about it see? If you do she’ll know I told you. Just wait and see if she brings it up maybe, but then again, we have no secrets.
I was driving around the farm on the EZGO later this evening and came up to that lake from the back, over by Gibson’s house, and as I was coming through the patch of woods right there I startled up a deer from somewhere and it took off running in front of me. WE don’t quite have the EZGO juiced up to deer speed but I did my best to pursue. The neat thing was that the deer had nowhere to run really but out into the field and so I got to watch it run full speed toward the bridge. It made it to the other side of the field and I parked on the edge of the trees on the side of the field I was on, and then he stopped. He (maybe she) stopped and we stared at each other for a moment, and then he turned and took off running again back into the woods.
I thanked the farm for my deer encounter right then and there. This place is incredible. There’s so much going on beyond the human realm and all you have to do is go around and observe things. Nature explains itself at the same time that it inspires itself.
Is this a sign I should go back to Deer Valley?
(Just kidding.)
Grandma Talk:
We were eating some of the Risotto that the executive chef at Brooks’ restaurant made especially for Grandma last night, and she wasn’t even there. I stopped by after my day at the fair with some new friends and the chef just walked over and bagged it up for us to take home no questions asked.
“I’ve got a soft spot in my heart for your Grandmother. She is the coolest lady,” he was explaining to my friends MaryBeth and Mandy.
So anyways we were eating and I asked her how the two big trees outside the window had always been there.
“These two? Oh nooo. When we first moved here somehow, and I’m not sure who, but people round town referred to this place as ‘Four Oaks’ or they would say they were “going to the four oaks,” or something like that because there was. There were four oaks up here. Two over there and two here. But you see during the storm they were flattened altogether. After that’s when these got planted and it sure is nice to have ‘em finally full grown and all.”
The storm she’s talking about I gathered is the one I’ve heard about and it wasn’t a storm it was a tornado. As the story goes I guess a good number of people had come out to the farm to hide in bathtubs and cellars and whatnot to get away from the storm and so the driveway was full of cars. The tornado came through and everyone was hiding except. I’ve had this moment described to me before I’m sure. Everyone’s taking cover except Pop whose standing there in the picture glass window staring the tornado down as it came right up to the house, literally, and took out two of the famous big oak trees and then literally hoped over the house and didn’t touch it. What makes this story incredible is if you see a picture of where the trees where that got smashed. They are literally right next to the house and they were utterly “flattened” was the word she used, but the house went untouched.
The way I see it Pop stared down a tornado and won so the tornado admitted defeat and left his house alone. Pop really did have the sort of power I think. As Grandma finished retelling that part of the story I said, “It’s just one of those things, kind of like in the car today. Lord’s just looking out for us sometimes.”
Grandma has this sort of hunch she does whenever she recognizes something profound about herself but it too humble to really claim it or anything so she does this, “Mmmmhmmm, guess so…” and shrugs her shoulders. It’s so cute.
Grandma followed up remembering the story about when the man from the power company came out after that and mentioned to Frank, “Weren’t there a couple really big trees over there last time we were here?”
“Sure were,” (imagine Grandma here doing a Frank voice impersonation as she’s telling the story) “Storm came through and SQUASHED it straight down into the ground!” Grandma says with a squashing hand motion as she laughs remembering the look on the poor boy’s face after Pop said that. We had a great laugh and I remembered how damn funny Pop was.
Later Grandma came to the back room to get me and point out the super pink, super beautiful sunset that was happening. She didn’t want me to miss it and we shared a moment of awe for nature.
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